Feb. 28,2011...sigh

Well poor hubby just headed to the doctor's office. He has been calling off sick all week with a chest cold, cough and some dizziness. Of course we clash a bit when he is home longer than 3 days in a row watching the tube and yelling at me. I know he does not feel well. It is a truth that he cannot be home and amongst family or friends longer than 2 days without the need to run away or pick a fight. It has always been this way. I have know him 38 years and been married for 32 next month. I would say it has not been the marriage of the century..we are stubborn creatures. But we make it work. I figure you stay with something because you are getting something out of it..and even if that seems mercenary..it can be that you are getting something very good out of it for both of you. I prefer to think that we have helped each other out over the years. He has been sick with diabetes for several years and now is on insulin which has brought back his funny personality that attracted me to him at first! It has been hidden over years of him not feeling well and continuing to provide. He was a great Dad to the little boys, then not so great as they reached their teens, illness undetected and his usual inability to handle being around people for extended periods of time. I am afraid our sons have not been as forgiving as they see how he has talked to me over the years..but I am no saint I tell them...mistakes on both sides. We are still together, still butting heads, yet somehow it works out for the best. Hopefully he will start to feel better soon and can go back to work..because he needs that structure.
Is this too personal? I hope not..I post it because I know life is not perfect and we must make things work if we can. Other things are simply not going to be controlled by us. It seems long years have gone into figuring out who, what, why and still questions abound.
But we will reach 32 years of marriage and know that we are the only ones in our respective families except for our parents to do so.
I probably should mention that Hubby has lost both his parents and his only brother. He is alone except for us..so I try not to judge too harshly...He is a good man who has lived life!
I will tell you of his many talents..He makes beautiful knives, he creates their leather sheathes and other devices for his buddies at work so they can safely conveniently carry their little flashlights and cell phones. He is a good fisherman! Loves large mouth bass and Walleye and Northern Pike. He has a ton of ideas on how to build or fix things and with humorous results sometimes..things get quirky!
He has always allowed me to be me. Has never tried to control me..maybe realizing what a futile effort that would be. He has been a good cook.
He has always worked hard and loyally for his companies.
He can rewire a house, plumb it, build it and fix it.
We love a road trip..we are so due one! He would drive for hours and we would take the craziest roads..seeing vistas only the coyotes might see!
He has always supported my art.
And he will build a fence and a house for whatever critter I bring home. He happily leaves the brush piles and overgrowth so I can enjoy the wildlife that visits.
So I will give him his 3rd day of crabbiness and beyond..because when it is good it is very good and when it is bad..it is tolerable!!!
I will pick a few photos out here..not sure what yet!!!

here we go..my graduation, with hubby and sons, where we love to go..to the mountains!, Hubby, fireworks!!!

Feb.27,2011 Front side back side Frank

The 8 inches of snow melted that afternoon..a few inches the next morning, and gray skies..and yet I see some blue skies to the west...
Took a few hours to dung out the bedroom and closet to rearrange for office in the closet and a table for small art work yesterday. I measured everything..I did! But that old desk just really didn't fit in the closet like it should have. and certainly not with the old wood files! So the desk is in, the files are out and the printer is on top of the files. It is working. I have my little table for sewing if I feel the urge and the 6 foot folding table with the art stuff. And should we have an overnight guest the foldaway bed still fits.
It is physical work that I needed and I got inspite of bum knees. Today my son and I will drive to Salt Lake City where I will drop off library books and pick up a bit of stuff from my studio..then hopefully I can actually get work done on some art projects.
All of this mundane stuff and last night I had some really interesting dreams. What does it mean when a retailer sets out huge lovely tubes of paint for artists to have and the one I find is empty and has a spider nest in it!!?? I so wanted a big tube of white paint but was willing to settle for that yellow ochre. I woke up laughing..
Anyway..have a great day. I am posting some photo of something here...enjoy!

Feb. 25,2011

Snow!!!! I spent a good hour or more just on my property taking photos of the snow designs and one of our resident Baby Kitty Mama..she is cute. I will load these pics and go to work..have a great day!!!

Feb. 24,2011 Jackdaw!

What do you do when you wake up and cannot get back to sleep? I figured I would go to bed early..well, early for me is around 11:30pm. At 7am I am wide awake and I decided to get a look at a big art book I had borrowed from the library that has to be returned this weekend. It is about the Blue Rider group (Bleu Reiter)...Jawlensky, Klee, Kandinsky, and Feininger. I am a real Klee and Kandinsky fan. I love the color and freedom of form and line they incorporated. There is some wonderful history about the group who was better known in the USA after WWI when the original member Gelka Sheyer came over from Germany and convinced the others to come and share their art. She promoted them vigorously until her death in 1945. Jawlensky was born in Russia..close to where Chagall was born. He named gave Gelka her nickname that she used the rest of her life. It means Jackdaw in Russian. They knew and hobnobbed with the likes of Marlene Deitrich, Charlie Chaplin, John Cage...
As a group though they were ignored in Germany until the 90's when there have been some retrospectives. Franz Marc was a fringe member but he died at a young age and was not an essential participant. I also like the Leipsig painters who came along in the 80's. Saw a nice retrospective in Salt Lake City a few years ago. I also read a bio of Chagall recently. I cannot seem to get enough of these artists and their lives. I find them so interesting. I like to know why and when they painted. what influenced them in relationship to the history and political environment surrounding them at the time of their art making. DuChamp has interesting events that influenced his art..in particular the suitcase art he did since he had to immigrate. Many of the artists I have read about had such harsh times and sadness. Dealing with wars, plagues, political turmoil and hatred.. It is hard enough to be an artist and then to have to create through such turmoil..wow. We are so lucky..many of us today who although feel political turmoil in our lives are not dealing with horrid deprivation, fear for our lives and loss. Maybe these factors made artists great. Maybe having to work with whatever they could find and slog around for funds, and take on commissions that consumed their lives in order to feed their children made them great. What do you think? Can you be a great artist with minimal suffering? Do we have to be starving to find meaning in our art, to break out and become new and interesting? I have had some financial hard times..but nothing like these artists have gone through. I have had loss and sickness and pain..but really I have felt fortunate to be alive and happy. So many of us define ourselves by our troubles and illnesses and I think they tend to make us weaker..using the problems as an excuse to just go along. I feel that any break through for me will have to be because of effort and will. I don't want suffering to be in my bio someday! I would prefer a story of happiness and color...did that sound naive? Anyway I am off to work..have a great day.

Feb.23,2011

Today the sun is shining..but tomorrow night is a snow storm to remind us it is still February.

Tom Waits -'Make It Rain'

Tom Rocks!

I found out that now I am scheduled to be the closer..so my weekdays are 1-7pm at work but it is easy work. Still sort of messes with the going to my studio on weekdays. So weekends are it!!!I am setting up a small space in the tiny bedroom that used to hold all my art stuff for the small art workings so I can work in the mornings. At least having a job has given me impetus to get things done in a timely manner. I do have to go to the supervisor and let him know he scheduled me to work the hours I can't in March for the open studio..wouldn't you know that the only other closer is a 17 yr. old who announced yesterday that she was going to Las Vegas that weekend for a Lady Gaga concert! We shall see what happens..1 month for them to figure things out!
Have a great day everyone..prayers to Christchurch.

Feb.20,2011

I finally finished the bits I cut from the failed turtle painting. I have ended up with over 50 small pieces and 50 bookmarks!
So I better not ruin another large watercolor..because this is a lot of work!
And I hate to waste when there were some good passages.
I also made a small art journal. It has card stock covers, Thai Phenom paper end pages and arches 90Lb. paper pages. All stamping done with handmade stamps I made yesterday. I used a plastic eraser and carved 4 sides. Then I cut up a soft lino block and carved some more stamps. That was fun and easy with some nice effects. I used the same stamps for the 30+ paintings.
I plan to make some more art journals because they are fun to do.
It has been snowing today, rain yesterday..good days for art!
Hope your weekend is fun too.

Feb. 19,2011

ahh a rainy day and I am home alone with the cats and pugs..so maybe not really alone! But such a nice day to start some art journal building on my little kitchen table. I have had my coffee and my time on the computer..now time to do art...
This painting I did for a class. oil on wood..rather large. Then I gave it to a friend and he painted on it and added collage effects..let me find it now...
The painting is called Jesus Loves Me Yes I Know. And the one I did on my friend's charcoal drawing is The Wolf at the Door. It has a little window in the top that has a watercolor scene in it and collage elements. It now resides at his mother's home since he moved to Portland.

Feb. 17,2011 All my thanks..I join the ranks of the employed!

I want to thank all of my blogger friends who kept me in their good thoughts and prayers for the job. I did not get the one I was waiting for a call back on..but never fear..where one door closes..another opens before you even know it! I was looking at the clock yesterday and realizing that the call back would not happen when I got a call from the new dry cleaners just down the street. I went in for an interview at 12:45 and was told they would call me and by 2pm I had the job! I am actually a bit silly about it. I will be opening the store at 7am weekdays and some Saturdays. I get off at 1pm unless it is really slow. I will sort the shirts and dry cleaning..putting invoices into the computer, greeting and helping customers, bagging the clean clothing and starting a dry cleaning load so something is ready for the pressers when they come in. It doesn't pay terrific..but once my knees are back in shape..I can walk! and best of all it is one of those jobs you can go to and leave behind when you clock out. Once I am back into the swing of working again..I can use the afternoons, evenings, and weekends to do art. I actually think..plan on making myself adhere to a schedule for my art. Everyone seems nice and helpful. So in spite of being on my feet the whole time..it should be fun and it is a paycheck. Thanks heavens..I can finally contribute to our finances again. Again my thanks to you all for your prayers..that must have done it for me!

Feb. 16,2011

Today it is still warm for February. But the winds are up and supposed to blow in a snow storm tonight. Still a flock of about 50 robins showed up a few days ago and have been singing their little hearts out. I hope they know something about spring that I don't! The chickens have enjoyed a week of getting out and stirring up the leaf debris in the field. They are a happy lot..clucking and canoodling with The Rooster I Call Bob all over our property and the neighbor's horse pasture.
The knee is a bit better. Still restless nights and I finished the Tailchaser Song book. I have 2 dvds to watch. One on Cezannne in Provence and another movie about Rembrandt called Nightwatching. That is the fun thing about Netflix. I rent all the art movies and documentaries along with some of the newer releases and watch at my leisure. Problem is I watch them late night and then snooze a bit through them! Then I have to go back and see what I missed!
I did see the Scottish Deerhound win the Westminster Dog Show. Now there is a wonderful breed. I always wanted one. But the breeders are a closed lot and they put you on a waiting list after you have provided references. Then they keep your dog for 3 years as they show and finish its' championship! A friend who had been showing German Shepherds successfully for years and whose husband is the retired CEO of a well known toy company (with the $$ to spend) could not get a deerhound!!
So I have never owned one.
The photo I posted today was one I took a few days ago when the sun decided to come out of hiding.
I hope to get started on making some eraser stamps and building my journals today.
No news on the job call back. So I assume I am not in the running. Still they have the rest of the day to call!
I hope you all have a great day today. I intend to!

Feb. 15,2011

Got my taxes done and filed and now that worry is out of the way. I worried it and procrastinated until I finally made myself sit down and do it. I can't be creative with worries hanging over my head..yet I waited to get it taken care of! I wonder sometimes why I do what I do!
That said I brought some things home to make art journals and do more little ink washes on remnants of the large watercolor I cut up. I don't want to spend my money on gasoline to get to my studio for a few days. (a good excuse for having a studio at home!)
Also I am too tired to drive. I have not slept well in several nights. I have had lots of knee pain, and now it feels like a pinched nerve. Either way..it keeps me up at night. Then there have been tiny 2.8 earthquakes not far from here and although I have not felt them..the pugs have and jump off the bed barking at 2:30 in the morning when the event has occurred over the past 3 nights!! Last night I lay on the couch with ice on the knee until 4 am..reading Tailchaser's Song by Tad Williams. I read it years ago and to be honest..I remembered nothing about the story! That can be a good thing..like reading a book for the first time! It is about cats and their secret lives being threatened by dangerous forces. Tailchaser is the hero cat. This book was written on the tails (pun intended) of Watership Down which was about rabbits. That is another one I have forgotten and now can reread!
I have the same problem with movies. I don't remember them at all and could swear I have never seen them..then 2/3 the way through..I think..oh yeah..I did see this one!
That is my current form of dementia.
The good news is I should be able to completely catch up the mortgage this month which has been another weight on me. I am posting my painting that I did of our now old and sickly Miss E. Claire. I sold this one at the winter exhibit and almost said no to the buyer..but I can do a better one another time. This is in honor of the cats of the book and in my home and on my property. I don't know their secret names but I feed them and hope they are happy.

Feb. 14,2011

Maybe I am just a wee bit cynical about Valentines Day.

Feb. 13,2011 goofing off

Do you keep a day planner? A schedule, a reminder book? Well I try but even when I add everyone's birthdays I forget after awhile that the little dayplanner is in the bottom of my bag or left on the kitchen table, or lost forever!
I went to the bank one day..had to go inside for a transaction, I picked up a free calendar for my studio, which I admit I rarely look at since I quit entering shows for a year. But there was a pile of those little fake leather black day planners..just the right size to fall to the bottom of my art bag and get fished out in 8 months..oops!
But I cannot resist a little book with any blank spaces..so I grabbed one.
When I returned home I looked at it..ready to fill it with the important dates in my life..whatever they are..I have birthdays memorized so I don't need it for that, I am on a self imposed sabbatical from entering art shows, so I don't need it for that. I don't have a job yet so no schedule.
Eureka!!! I decided to draw tiny pictures in the day blanks so at the end of the year it looks like a weird piece of art.
I started of course with January. If you look at each square..you can see a tiny drawing, some have meaning for the day..but looking at it as a whole is kind of fun. I forget sometimes but because it is fun..I get the squares filled in a few minutes and feel like I had..well...fun. The other day I gessoed the cover and the inside pages ( dates to remember, ruler, address and phone numbers). I painted the cover in acrylics and had..you guessed it ..fun.
I haven't decided what to do on the gessoed pages..possibly tissue paper collage and ink. The hare on the cover is from a drawing my oldest son made in grade school..too cute. I used him in the other patchwork art I posted the other day. I like to "steal" children's drawings and use them in my fun arty times.
So now I know what to do do with my day planner. Have a wonderful and fun day!

duck love and cross your fingers I get the job!

My sister, brothers and Mom send ducks back and forth or put them in weird places for the others to find. Since I am 2000 miles away..I take the ducks to places I like and take pics on the phone and send them to my sister who updates everyone on where some of the rubber ducky family is. It is pretty random. You never know where or when one will appear. I took one to the Colorado Rockies games this summer and took pics with the marquee in the background. My poor Hubby was embarrassed!I also took one camping. I take a little one in my purse or pocket..just in case! All in goofy fun. My Dad would have loved this game. He was a great practical joker. It keeps us laughing. Here are 2 pics I took..one day in 40 degrees they went out to sun themselves on the deck..the next day they had to wade through 4 inches of snow..such is the life of ducks in Utah. Have a great weekend!
By the way..I had a job interview yesterday!!! The first one I have been able to get for over a year. A friend's son in law works for a plumbing supply and they need a customer service phone person. She gave me his email and I sent him my skimpy resume (my art resume is so much more interesting!). The company called on Thursday. I went in on Friday and hopefully can get a call back. They said there were 50 applicants they were looking at and if we don't get a call back by Wednesday next week then we are not being considered. I do want a call back. It pays $10.00 an hour to start and after 6 months you can get health insurance, paid vacations, paid holidays. I have never had a job with benefits so it would be awesome. Plus it is an easy drive, and I could go to my studio from there. I could afford my studio, I could pay my bills and let Hubby off the hook. I will admit that a 40 hour week will be a shock to the system. I haven't worked a 40 hour week for a long time. And to be honest. I have enjoyed not working..but the money pinch is hard to deal with so I need to suck it up and go back to work. Don't think I am lazy. I have worked since I was 12 yrs. old. I ran a dog grooming business when I was raising toddlers so I could be home. I worked 2 jobs when Hubby lost his job. I know how to work and am very reliable..but I feel old and tired and wish I could just do art. Still..cross your fingers that I get this job..it could be fun..talking on the phone is my forte! And I could get paid! Now go and have that great weekend!

Feb.10,2011

Just a little fun. Watercolor and Marie's Chinese paint on Canson Art Board

Feb.8,2011

overthinking and not overthinking

Since I have posted paintings and drawings that I know my head got in the way of..here is something I did last night to get out of my head and have fun with color.
I had a very large watercolor I started from that nasty roll of watercolor paper. It was huge, had some nice textural effects and washes but I ruined it by OVERTHINKING!
I added turtles, leaves and it went south in a hurry.Yesterday I went to my studio and got out the scissors. When all was said and done..I have a pile of strips for the freebie bookmarks I give away to children who come to the open studio and 24 various small bits of the best colored parts and 5 larger ones.
Then while watching my Pittsburgh Steelers lose the Superbowl..I got out my stamps, ink pads and old Winsor Newton ink bottle and had some fun.
I stamped up the bookmarks and punched holes in the tops for the nice ribbon I will buy later. Then I took water and sprayed the various small squares and rectangles, dripped inks and gold ink afterwards. First I stamped most of them.
This was messy, fun and turned out surprisingly well if I may say so myself!!
Of course the gold ink needed shook up every so often and I shook it vigorously one time and gold ink went everywhere!!! I sopped up what was on the table and paper towels with other little bits that I had not inked yet and the wood table has a sparkle about it in the scratches.Luckily they are water soluble inks!
I had so much fun I wanted to share.
I am thinking that custom bright white mats for each and hanging them in a nice grouping will be a nice effect.
All told..I did 24 little paintings and 40 bookmarks and I feel great.

Feb.6,2011

This 1st painting is one I thought about a long time..then when I began it became harder than I thought it would be. I am not happy with it..but here it is. I actually like the sky and trees.
These are 2 small Green Men..#6 and #7. These are color pencil on watercolor with acrylic highlights 6.5" x 7"

This my Green Man #5. He is watching a Bumblebee. 16"x20", color pencil and watercolor with acrylic highlights on Crescent watercolor board.
He was fun to do. I think I am anxious for green leaves again!!! It is very cold here but sunny.